Thoughts

I just had a slight freak-out moment. I was sitting on campus, revising some short stories for my creative writing class, when I remembered the slew of campus-related short story contests with deadlines in February. This caused the following train of thought:

Speaking of February, Amazon's annual Breakout Novel Award contest is in February.

Holy shit! February! That's two months!!

I wanted to have IE ready for it in February 2009 but I wasn't ready in time. I swore to myself I'd be ready in 2010.

Holy shit, I won't be ready in 2010! This time last year I was at the same point in my first draft as I am right now in my 2nd draft. I thought I could do it, but I couldn't. There's no way I can polish it by February.

Another year. ANOTHER. YEAR. that I haven't met any of my writing goals. Another year that I have sworn to myself I'd meet a deadline and I haven't.

Another year IE isn't done, when the 1st draft was 75% done in 3 months. The other 25% and 50% of the 2nd draft I have done now have taken about 16 months to finish. And I still have the rest of d2 and at least another draft.

Why can't I meet my goals? Will IE ever get finished?

I love IE. I want to finish it!!

Arrrgggghhhhh!!!!!!!

.... and those were my thoughts. It's finals time, can you tell?